A Servant's Heart

Exploring how I can express love to my family by means of my service to them.

Archive for the category “Headship”

The Foot Bath

My husband came in today from a long period of cleaning and working and cooking.  I looked at his face, softened with fatigue, his forehead glistening slightly, and I followed him into the living room and sat to listen to him.  He told me of his day and shared things he heard and things he said.  I didn’t always think he said the best thing, but I did not criticize.  He spoke himself to his own conclusion that he might have spoken to someone a bit harshly and he reproved his own self.  I reminded him that he was a good man.  He pushed his boots off, each one with the toe of the other foot and I removed them into the hallway.  “You’re feet stink,” I said.  He laughed.

I went upstairs to bring him some things he asked me for, and also brought a clean, hot wet washcloth and a dry one, too.  I grabbed a bottle of sandalwood shampoo, lavender and tea tree essential oil, and super emollient body cream and sat on the floor on the brown leather pillow before him.  It exhaled beneath me.  I squeezed the shampoo in my hand and massaged his feet until the shampoo disappeared.  Then, I grabbed the hot washcloth and began to wipe his feet as gentle suds appeared.  The mild abrasiveness from the cloth encouraged me to scrub-massage — instep, arch, heel.  I glanced up at him and he rested his head in his hands as his eyes slowly closed.  He looked peaceful.  I went and rinsed the cloth off again in the sink, warming it further, and then stood over his foot as I wiped off the remaining soap and then dried his foot with the towel.  After sitting back down, smiling to myself as the pillow heaved another sigh, I sprinkled a few drops of the fragrant oil in the palm of my hand and then scooped out a finger gob of the rich white body cream.  I rubbed them together in the palm of my hand and then applied the mixture onto his foot until it glistened and warmed.  The lovely smell filled the room, soothing, calming, and subtly stimulating at the same time.  He moved his toes back and forth and smiled.

“Is that the oil that smells so good?”

“Yes.  Is it tingling?”

“No.”

“Is your foot warm?”

“Yes.  It feels good.  Thank you.”

On to the next foot and then a kiss on the top of each.  Same process.  Same feeling.  Same smell.  Same love.  Same thank yous. Same peace.  I know that made him feel good.  Relaxed.  Kingly.  Loved.

And it made me feel lovely.  Sweet.  Full of gratitude.  Happy.

“There is more happiness in giving than there is in receiving.”  Acts 20:35

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Over my head? Under my head

I have a few things that I obsess about internally.  They’re not the things most people would probably say I obsess about.  Most people don’t really know me very well.  But, anyway, one thing I obsess about is wearing a head covering.  I am Christian — I am one of Jehovah’s Witnesses — and the question is out there as to whether or not Christian women are required to cover their heads.  Well, I’m not sure that it is a requirement; it’s certainly not a requirement to be a Christian or to be a professed Christian.  But for me, my heart convicts me.  For me, as a married woman, it is right.  It honors God; it honors my husband; it honors the headship arrangement; it dignifies me and my faith; it sets an example for onlookers; including the angels; it does not stumble.  I wonder if the angels that left their positions and came to earth to be with women were stumbled by the beauty and glory of their hair.  Or, was King David really struck by Bath-sheba’s hair?  Who knows.  It probably doesn’t matter.  But for me, my reading of 1 Corinthians 11:3-16 makes the issue clear, clear, clear.  Modern interpretations say it is just talking about women who pray or prophesy in the congregation.  But the congregation is not a place, it’s the body of individuals that make up the congregation.  If a woman is not going to shave or shear her head, she should cover it as a sign of her submission to the headship arrangement.  And the fact that it is NOT a requirement, demonstrates that for women who choose to cover, it is a sign of their WILLING submission to the headship arrangement.  This is beautiful in God’s eyes.  It’s not an issue to be argued about and shouldn’t be forced on any woman, because if she doesn’t want to do it then, if she does, it is not willing submission.  Jehovah doesn’t force anyone to do anything and he doesn’t want sacrifice and service given under compulsion.  He wants our earnest, heartfelt sacrifices.

Now as for me, my heart really convicts me to cover my head even in my home.  If you have never done it, I challenge you to do so for 30 days and see what a difference it makes in how you feel and how people treat you.  Note both the positive and the negative responses.  Think about the ugliness behind the negative responses and the respect that comes from the positive ones.  It will change you, even if you don’t choose to continue.  It’s like putting on a personally tailored suit made from a high quality fabric or putting on a perfectly fitted ball gown of a luxurious material.  It just makes you feel better, stand better, carry yourself better.  A head covering dignifies a woman and makes her want to act in a more dignified manner.

Out of respect for the headship arrangement, I spoke to my husband on this issue.  He agreed, although he still did not try to make it a requirement for me, which I appreciate.  He understands it is my choice.  I really respect him for respecting me and not grieving me.  My next step is to notify my employer.  I probably don’t have too, but I will as a courtesy.  I think it is appropriate.

So, because this is one of the things I absolutely OBSESS over inside, I feel so happy to be acting on it.  Why is it so hard and scary?  Fear of persecution and being ostracized.  But I should be used to that; I have always been a bit odd and on the fringe.  That has actually been easy.  Conforming to the “norms” of society has been hard, especially since I don’t agree with many of our social norms.

Well, that’s all for now.  There are many nice videos on YouTube related to this issue.  I will let you know how things are going on this issue for me personally.

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